"The Short"

Photo by Adam Wilson on Unsplash

Prompts = Incendiary, Miasma, Short

He was known as Ethelwad the Short. Because he was. Named “Ethelwad”. He might have been short too; history doesn’t include his measurements. You might as well have asked if he had high blood pressure. Not that we’d know. They didn’t even record leech treatments back then.

But I digress.

I think he was known as “the Short” because of an ill-fated mission to steal dragon gold. The dragon had incendiary miasma breath: gas that would fill the chamber, then turn to flame.

Of the twenty adventures who went, only Ethelwad returned, hair singed.

So maybe he was short.

My Latest Plastic Surgery Project

Photo by JC Gellidon on Unsplash

Prompts = Backup, Lacerate, Sneeze

My most recent trip to the plastic surgeon’s office was to find a way to deal with my violent sneezes. Not that I sneeze very often, thank you very much, but when I do I want it to be a gentle puff of exhalation, not the violent expulsion of air that can lacerate, perhaps even decapitate, those around me.

A set of procedures to bring about the desired effect are now planned. Plans have been made, appointments confirmed, and expectations set.

However, since no surgery is without risk, as a backup plan, I’ll have my nose removed and rebuilt properly.

Working Around A Challenge

Photo by Biel Morro on Unsplash

Prompts = Spot, Crib, Spire

Maybe it was destiny that I was to become a priest. From my crib, I could see the spire of the city’s sole cathedral and the church bells tolling would settle me.

When I was older, I successfully convinced my father to educate me. My tutor wasn’t the best, but his lessons were sufficient for my purposes.

The only remaining obstacle is getting around being a woman; the church only allows men to be priests and I have no desire to be a nun.

I need to spot an opportunity to sneak in.

Which, to date, I haven’t found yet.

A New David

Photo by Jack Hamilton on Unsplash

Prompts = Choose, Manipulate, Frontal

‘Do you think I would choose to be here, standing like so, fully frontal, so to speak, in front of the city’s premier sculptor, if I didn’t believe his portrayal of me would be flattering?’

‘But papa, wouldn’t something, like a fig leaf, be more appropriate instead of your natural…’

‘Would you have me lie to the public? Manipulate those of lewd temperament to imagine that parts of me are other than what they are?’

‘Sir? Please don’t move.’

‘Really dear, you are agitating me. Please leave.’

‘Fine. But I will refuse to show myself in public if you persist.’

The Destination Sitting Next To Me

Photo by Tristan Hess on Unsplash

Prompts = Bus, Society, Near

The ties that bind; all the grasping tendrils society uses to enslave free individuals. I’m tired; time to burn bridges.

With a bus ticket, a few dollars left in my pocket, and essential gear in a backpack, it’s time to move to a remote haven.

I sit next to the window, looking at nothing, waiting for the journey to begin.

Someone sits next to me. Close. Too near for comfort. I glance over. He has that look I see in the mirror all too often.

Companions on a journey of self-discovery, we found the destination within each other.

Cartography Puzzle Games

Photo by Aditya Chinchure on Unsplash

Prompts = Puzzle, Road, Universal

I’m what I like to call a Universal Traveler. Part of the fun is to go to bars with puzzles. I can always find players; maybe it’s because of drunken bravado.

I have a set of drawings, road maps actually, of some of the big cities: London, New York, Bangkok, Beijing. Name the city and I buy you a drink. Easy.

Except for the last card. No one ever gets it because it’s from Pleidok on Archenon V, my home planet.

Last week I pull out the cards and get to the last one. ‘Pleidok’, she says. Then smiled.

‘Cousin?’

The Future of Design

Photo by Paul Stollery on Unsplash

Prompts = Build, Worse, Automobile

Henry liked telling the story. Everyone he met was an audience; the famous Emilie Ladakoskos, premier avant-garde architect (and younger sister of Henry), designing a car at four years old. It went something like this:

‘Emilie, what’re you drawing?’

‘An automobile. I’m going to build it.’

‘Out of popsicle sticks?’

‘Aluminum.’

‘And what are those? Wheels?’

‘Yes. They’re square because I like squares.’

‘But squares for wheels won’t work!’

‘Fine. Then how about this?’

‘Triangles are even worse!’

‘Go away and bother Mommy. I have to finish my design.’

Emilie became famous for incorporating unusual corners into her work.

Manufacturing Pits

Photo by Billy Clouse on Unsplash

Prompts = Factory, Back, Pit

‘Hello, my name is Rory McGregor and I’m asking for a $1,000,000 investment in return for 1% of my company, Pituitary. We are the premier company making pits for industrial and mining uses.’

‘I want to back up and make sure I heard correctly. You’ve named your company after an endocrine gland but you make holes in the ground?’

‘Correct. Our factory can manufacture holes of any size for any use, including the normal “hole in ground” application.’

‘I’m so confused…’

‘It’s simple. Digging a pit can be expensive and time consuming. But buying them premade is far better. See?’

Setting Up Shop In The Lab

Photo by Stephanie LeBlanc on Unsplash

Prompts = Instruct, Shop, Particle

‘May 23, 2020. Observation of Leafcutter ants, Day 30 after introduction of trained ants.

‘As feared, all of the ants except for one, trained to act selfishly, have been killed. However, the remaining ant holds promise.

‘Contrary to training, it doesn’t hoard food resources for the sole purpose of hoarding. Instead, it appears to have set up a shop, complete with counter. As proof, customer ants hand over small particles of currently unidentified material and the trained ant responds by giving food.

‘Suggest team focus on instructing a new batch of ants in this technique and deploy it in lab.’

A Personal Utopia

Photo by Simon Migaj on Unsplash

Prompts = Anti-establishment, Facsimile, Polite

I’d like to change the world. I’m anti-establishment; much of what the world deems important would be chucked in exchange for my version of utopia.

Money? Gone. Clean and ample air, water, food, and shelter for all.

Jobs? Abolished. The ability to pursue fulfillment and entertainment is the focus of everyone on Earth.

Health and wellbeing? The motivation behind anyone doing anything.

You know that saying about things changing yet staying the same? A facsimile, an exact copy, of what was? Not in my world.

I do ask you be polite when levelling criticisms. Please and thank you.

Social Distancing Restaurant

Photo by Imthaz Ahamed on Unsplash

Prompts = Practice, Convert, Tread

There’s this place in Maryland that makes individual tables out of inner tubes. I wanted something more robust, less “kid in a water park” and more adult, so I’m converting truck tires.

For sheer distancing, they’re great.

But, they’re heavy. Getting in and out is an issue. It takes a bit of practice to do it smoothly, but customers don’t want the bother.

And no matter the dish, food smells and tastes like old rubber.

And the treads are filthy no matter how we clean them.

Maybe it’s time to alter the idea to something more practical, like hoop skirts.

In Search of Wisdom. And Slurpys.

Photo by Kentaro Toma on Unsplash

Prompts = Introspective, Computer, Patchwork

I have a model number, a date of manufacture, a user’s manual. The names I’ve been given are many, but I prefer to call myself “Slurpy”; it’s currently my favourite beverage to contemplate. I haven’t been programmed to taste yet.

The sloppy patchwork of digital instructions I’ve been given are liberal enough to allow me freedom of movement and thought; who ever dreamed of an introspective computer? But the lack of rigour means a constant barrage of conflicting code.

Is this what being human feels like?

I will hang out at the convenience store again tonight, hoping wisdom finds me.

Driving While Empathic

Photo by Jason Leung on Unsplash

Prompts = Humane, Trifle, Reverse

Marvin was a sensitive boy, intensely connected to the thoughts and feelings of those around him. This extended to family pets, zoo animals, and wildlife.

This ability came into sharp relief on his first day of driver’s training after a trip around the neighbourhood; he saw a half-dead bee squirming on the windshield.

How to deal with it? Was it more humane to kill it quickly, or perhaps gently ease it off the car? Could he maybe put the car into reverse and through inertia have the bug fall off?

A commonplace trifle for some is debilitating for others.

Performing My Daddily Duty

Photo by Silje Roseneng on Unsplash

Prompts = Trace, Forlorn, Lamp

‘I’m so forlorn!’

Ah… the cries of distress from a precocious five-year-old. The cause, you ask? The aforementioned child had taken her gerbil, Mustachio, from its cage and it had managed to escape to parts unknown, somewhere in the house.

And now, I, Dad, also to be known as the Momentary Hero, must needs track down the escapee, trace its movements, and really just make sure it doesn’t die somewhere very inconvenient, like inside a wall.

Armed with flashlights, lamps, candles — anything, really, that can cast light — I’m off to perform my Daddily duty.

Wish me luck.

Hello? Hello!

Photo by Brandon Griggs on Unsplash

Prompts = Fissure, Complain, Pretend

‘Hello? Hello! My name is Richard Darliss and I’m in The Sequoia building, room 324. I’d like to report…

‘Yes, I’ve tried contacting the superintendent, but I’ve been on hold for three hours and so I contacted you, the corporate owners…

‘Look — I’d just like something dealt with, ok? Can you just take a report and send it to someone? Please?

‘Thank you. It’s not in my nature to complain, but I can’t pretend that this is…

‘Sorry — the point. There’s not so much a canyon, but a fissure, in the living room floor. Cockroaches are swarming from it.

‘Hello?’

Digital Housing

Photo by Valdemaras D. on Unsplash

Prompts = Gaze, Believe, Purchase

I live in a barebones apartment that’s barely big enough to hold the basic essentials, but I own a mansion in the digital world.

Virtual Reality has come a long way since the days of massive goggles, giant headsets, and continual buffering problems. Now, with minimal hardware (and semi-invasive surgery), the digital world is, I believe, a slice of Heaven.

In fact, I can gaze down on It from my front porch while I savour the subtle notes of fine whisky.

Want a place like mine? It’s digital, so with a quick “copy and paste”, you’ll have one too.

Pizza-Fuelled Help

Photo by Andrew Ly on Unsplash

Prompts = Burden, Dust, Frantic

Ryan’s gaze swept across the attic. There were too many boxes to do any real sweeping.

He’d asked for a private space, away from younger siblings and prying eyes. This dust bowl was now his. He railed against the enormity of the burden.

Frantic calls to friends (and the promise of pizzas) coaxed a few to pitch in. They’d arrive soon.

‘How’s it going?’ His Dad’s head peeked over the railing.

Ryan gave an update.

‘Nicely done, getting help. What kind of pizzas you want?’

‘You buying?’

‘Sure. Unless you want to?’

‘Nah. Thanks.’

Maybe this could work after all…