Moss Piglet Submissions for the June 2025 Issue - Gardens

 I submitted two works for the June 2025 issue of Moss Piglet - Gardens:

The Market of Twan

Who knew it’d be such a big deal. I never figured it’d cause such an uproar. The suffering my kind has endured from a simple customer cold call has been, no matter how you look at it, uncalled for.

The Garden of Eden. Paradise on Earth, if you believe the advertising. But look closely - Eden is a grade-school anagram of the word “need”. If someone is satisfied with only the things they need - air, water, essential foodstuffs, basic shelter - then Eden was, indeed, paradise.

But we all know there is far more to life than need. There’s want! And as a trade representative for the Market of Twan (because one basic anagram deserves another), all I did was show Eve a small sampling of the goods and services on offer, all at discounted prices and conveniently located with ample parking.

By any measure, needing only a small fruit sample to induce someone to come to the market was a huge success. It was only when Eve’s landlord got involved that everything blew up. They were evicted. I was demonized. Massive overreaction! And would they pick up supplies at the Market before shopping for new housing? No - they blamed me for souring the relationship.

I slithered off at first, but then sloughed off my old skin and went about the rest of my route, hoping I’d earn a commission at my next stop. Such is life in sales.

Madison Square Garden

Hello. I’m Kathleen Kayhill and this is the Six O’Clock News.

Our top story tonight - a New York entertainment giant is suing the city of Madison and its new installation.

Officials today received a cease and desist order from the law offices representing Madison Square Garden in New York City. They claim that the name of the new garden impinges on existing trademarks.

We asked Madison’s mayor, Regina Perkins, for her thoughts:

“I don’t understand the problem. We have a lovely garden that’s square and located in Madison. Frankly, the New York City one is a complete misnomer. If we’re forced to change our name to something like Madison Rhomboidal Garden, I think they should be forced to change the NYC one to something like ‘(not in) Madison (not) Square (and not a) Garden’. Seems fair to me.”

We also reached out to the city’s attorney, whose only comment was, “The mayor said what?”

Come back after the break and we’ll let you know if it’ll be a dry weekend for the Madison Marathon.